My thoughts have started up again 👏🏽

I had that post the other day about a concept I'd been toying with: Rohan potentially being autistic. I'm still a little nervous to commit to that, because I'd want to do it justice, but the one thing I can commit to is that he grew up on the outside of all the other children.

That's really stuck in my head. I'm honestly not sure if he's ever had an interaction with someone on the show - other than Angus - where it actually started as something positive. Think about it:

Even Conchobar yells at him a little. Fin Varra tries to crush him between some rocks. Cathbad technically starts off defending him, but also summons a skeleton - which Rohan thinks is cool, so I guess we'll still count that as positive.

... I am just noticing now that every time Rohan met another one of the Mystic Knights, Angus was there too.

Interesting 👀

I digress uwu

Rohan's grown up - and still lives a life - with people coming at him with hostility for this reason or that one. And he takes it in stride. It's really like he's used to it, along with disappointing everyone. That's where the people pleasing side shines. He's so weirdly accepting of everyone thinking he's weird or unworthy or someone to put back in his place, and it's truly only Angus who's been at his side. That's why he emphasizes it when Angus is enchanted into fighting Rohan: he needs his best friend beside him. Not Cathbad, not his team, but Angus specifically. Angus is Rohan's rock.

(tee-hee pun)

👀

r u thinkin wut im thinkin

👀

What if Angus was just as bad?

We know how Rohan and Angus met Cathbad. By then, they were already friends. But as I was writing that post about Rohan coming across as autistic-coded, and Cathbad thinking Angus was another village kid taking advantage of Rohan's kind nature...

And then there was some other random post about character dynamics, where two people were each other's guard dog and actually enjoyed it or didn't care. Angus is so loyal. Rohan's loyal right back, but Angus is SO LOYAL.

That mashed together into me remembering that much older idea (was it this post? 🤔) of Rohan getting knocked out in a forest after a storm, then waking up to see Angus peering down at him, the first thing Rohan sees when his vision comes back. And from there, they're friends.

So I'm picturing Rohan being in a village. Not one near Kells yet (I still adore the idea of Angus moving them from place to place to stay ahead of the Temran army), but one where Angus and some other kids live.

And they bully him.

He's weird. He's strange. Maybe he's new to the village. He's too trusting and sincere. He's the easiest target to be picked on, even with a stupid sword, because what's he gonna do? Fight them? They're innocent villagers, and 'knights' don't hurt those. Except he's not a knight and never will be.

I'm imagining a time where Deirdre actually asks Rohan how he and Angus became such good friends, while she's watching him grind herbs for Cathbad at the druid's How're. Maybe she's realizing how hard true friendship is to find, and muses that it must be because she's a girl. Surprisingly, Rohan says it can be just as difficult for boys. That catches Deirdre off-guard; he and Angus are practically inseparable. But Rohan shrugs and says it's different now from how it was back then. Now, yes, they are inseparable. Growing up...

She pries into it until he admits none of the other kids liked being around someone who never stopped talking about being a knight. Some kids would even be cruel. Dangerous. Deirdre thinks that surely he can't mean Angus, but Rohan says Angus used to be the worst one. Everybody liked him, and he had so much influence over the others that Rohan couldn't escape it. Angus would get the others to come up with 'warrior training' for him, trapping him in caves or throwing dirt or whatever little mean thing they thought might be fun.

This is beyond shocking for Deirdre to hear. I doubt she'd even believe it. But Rohan might mention that it's part of the reason Cathbad's been so reluctant to fully accept Angus. Rohan's moved on from those scars, and Angus has made up for everything that happened when they were kids a hundred times over, but memories take longer to fade for druids, and Rohan had eventually told Cathbad everything.

Deirdre asks what changed for them. Rohan says he 'won' Angus' friendship. There was a witch, apparently, that lived in a particular forest. Angus had dared Rohan to prove himself to the kids by going to that witch's house. The trouble was, the witch's house didn't exist. The forest where it was supposed to be was known for being almost endless - so many had been lost before, and Rohan might've been the next one. But he was prepared to brave it if it meant he'd win something.

Angus had laughed and asked what Rohan wanted for this.

Rohan said he wanted a friend.

Angus and everyone else absolutely howled. But sure enough, he agreed, saying that if Rohan went to the witch's house and brought back proof, Angus would be his best friend.

Rohan had said it had to be forever.

Angus promised they'd be best friends 'til the day they died.

So they agreed.

The day Rohan went in, he left a trail for himself, carving into the trees to find his way back. But he wouldn't be returning until he found this witch's house. The day faded, night set in, and still nothing. Another day passed, and that one brought a storm.

Rohan was blinded by the rain, none of the trees offering any shelter from it. The pain of its cold sting kept him awake at least, enough to keep searching. On and on he looked until finally, the worst happened: a tree shattered from lightning and landed on Rohan, pinning him under it.

Another day passed as Rohan passed out.

He wakes up to someone gently slapping him. With the sun overhead and his vision blurry, it's like some otherworldly, glowing shape of light. A few more smacks, and Rohan's eyes adjust to see Angus, standing over him and asking if he's dead. Rohan's woozy, not dead, but definitely trapped.

Angus says he followed Rohan's trail after there was no sign of the boy returning. There wasn't really a witch's house, but there was a storm, and Angus wasn't so cruel as to let Rohan die out here just because he wanted a friend. (He would wait two days before going in after Rohan, though.) It kind of stopped being funny when it turned out Rohan was that desperate.

He says all this while digging Rohan out from under the tree. When Rohan's loose, Angus shrugs and says they should head back, but Rohan says he isn't leaving until he finds the witch's house.

Angus is annoyed. He'd just said there was no witch's house. That was a joke. No sense dragging it out anymore, so time to go back.

Rohan asks if Angus will be friends with him. When Angus laughs, Rohan says he's staying until he finds the witch's house. And then he starts walking (limping) deeper into the forest.

Angus, genuinely confused, starts running after Rohan, saying there's no witch. After Rohan ignores him, Angus just... trails along, eventually asking why Rohan has to be so weird all the time. Maybe he'd have some friends if he knocked it off with all the big talk about being a knight. Kids like them didn't become knights. All Rohan ever seemed to do was rub that in their faces.

It'd be a slow, careful conversation. The two would talk for the first time ever, and Rohan - still weird - might say a few odd things that actually get Angus to laugh. A nice laugh. Not the cruel one he'd only ever had before. But no matter how many times Angus brings it up, Rohan refuses to go back until he's found the witch.

They stay another night in the forest. Angus doesn't hate it. Rohan notices how different Angus is when he's not surrounded by the other kids, and Angus shrugs, not getting into it.

When Angus wakes up the next morning, he's alone. And he instantly panics, thinking he's been abandoned in the forest. It'd be the perfect revenge, actually. And in the minutes of terror flooding his head, he thinks he's a fool to let his guard down like that. This was a stupid idea, and he's doomed himself with it.

Then Rohan appears. He's brought breakfast. He was foraging while Angus was asleep.

All is instantly forgiven once Angus is fed - and Rohan's very proud of himself for finding something Angus likes.

But he still isn't going back. Not until he finds the witch.

Angus sighs and says fine, they can be friends if they just go back. Rohan asks if they're going to be best friends - for life, like the deal said. Angus is very, very hesitant to openly yell 'no,' but that hesitation is all Rohan needs to pack up and keep searching the forest.

Angus comes along, because at this point, he may as well. But Rohan has to stop for him a lot. He doesn't ever do this much walking.

There's no witch's house. But there were people who went missing in this forest forever. Rohan's not afraid - not as much as going back to that village - but Angus is starting to get creeped out. Just before he can ask Rohan to leave for the hundredth time, they suddenly hear it.

The witch.

Except it's not a house. It's a cave.

And that witch is a very, very big wolf.

(👀 loving that Angus has to fight the Rock Wolf when he's older to get his armour)

Angus freaks out and goes up the first tree he can. Rohan tries to climb up a different tree, but he's still hurt from when he got pinned. He has to duck under a different log, just barely getting away from the wolf's teeth, but it's started digging its way towards him.

There's not much time. Rohan's trying to slash at the wolf with his sword, but he can't seem to hit it hard enough from the angle he's at. But Angus, in the trees, some having been freshly struck and still smoldering from the storm's lightning, sees a massive tree limb that could fall if he could just get to it.

He's climbing over, moving as fast as he can, only to see a glimmer of metal in the leaves below him. That's Rohan's sword. What Rohan's fighting the wolf with is just a stick; he must've dropped it as he tried and failed to get up the tree. But that's almost lucky, because Angus can jump down now to get that sword. He snatches it up, getting back to the tree he needs to hack at to get the limb to fall.

As soon as the limb plummets to the ground, Angus drops the sword for Rohan to get. It's the perfect combination - the tree limb was a direct hit, and in the yelp of pain and confusion from the wolf, Rohan grabs his sword and finally scares the thing off.

They're breathless. They're tired. They're scared. But Rohan asks if that means he's won the bet.

Angus - out of instinct - says that wasn't a witch. But at the look of despair in Rohan's eyes, Angus finds himself saying, "... Well, I know knights can't lie. But I can. So... let's just say it was a hairy witch."

The walk back is just as weird as Angus expected, but there's an infectious joy and energy in how weird Rohan is. It's nice. Angus almost feels like he has someone keeping up with him for once, who doesn't mind how much Angus likes to talk, too.

Getting back to the village is a different story. The kids are cruel. Angus tries to awkwardly get them to ease off, but the moment they start to turn on him, Angus puts that down fast. Before morning, he's already decided he doesn't need to be here anymore. And him and Rohan are best friends now, right? So if Angus wants to go to another village, Rohan would come too, right?

I'm a little sleepy now (it's almost 2 am 😭) but the idea of this being a flashback episode to fully emphasize how close they are now absolutely delights me. I'd love to have some little callback after this, where Angus walks in to hear a short bit of Rohan's tale, right as Rohan's saying how loyal and caring and important Angus is to him. It's flattering, right up until Angus understands what they've been talking about.

Deirdre says at least they've outgrown all of that. It gives her hope for finding another princess to be best friends with. Maybe someday. But she leaves, happy to know friendship can blossom even under the worst environment.

In the quiet moment that follows, Angus shyly apologizes for everything that happened when they were kids. Rohan tries to brush it off, saying he's forgotten, but Angus tells him knights aren't supposed to lie. The small smile that earns gets Rohan to admit that it hurt to grow up with everyone thinking he was weird. He's glad to have Angus in his life, but he wishes it hadn't taken so much to earn it.

Angus says Rohan's always been gentle that way. He takes too much from people that shouldn't ever dare to give him that grief. But as Rohan agrees, he says it doesn't happen anymore. That's because of Angus.

There's a moment where Rohan stumbles to talk, but finally asks if Angus really is only friends with him because of a bet.

Angus thinks. The bet is what gave him the chance to get to know Rohan, of course. But no. He loves Rohan, and that's because of who Rohan is as a person. He's Angus' favourite, weird ball of fire who actually became the knight he said he'd be.

Rohan asks if Angus is telling the truth.

Angus says of course he is. He's a knight now, too.

Rohan, on a lighter note, says that as long as Angus is sticking with that, what happened to the snack he'd left on the table for later?

Angus says he cannot lie.

And then he leaves.

Rohan has a good laugh at that. It's one of the many ways - big and small - that Angus has done so much to bring him joy. Maybe there's a pang of anxiousness as the feeling of "It was only a bet" comes back to him, but in the next moment, he hears Angus calling to him to stop doing chores and come home fun. Possibly as Angus finds a brand-new power on Cathbad's shelf to play with. 🥲

What I especially love about this is how it still ties into my 'Rohan Villain Arc' idea. It's further fuel for the fire: the specter of Angus' childhood bullying can so easily rear its head in that fight, slamming a wedge between them with it alone.

ok i am actually very tired i need to sleep now